Match 124: Klown versus James the Never Give Up Kid (Review)

Green is definitely Klown's color.  Green is the color of the UCW fighter's skimpy new shimmering tights--and they, along with some added mass--in the right places--, are making all the difference in the world in this nineteen year old's watchability.

Not only does Klown look shockingly terrific showing off more of his skin, but the new look brings out new dimensions of his character.  Who could have guessed that the soft-spoken street kid with the soulful Kafka eyes would grow into such a fantastic heel?  He has a new swagger to go with the new threads too, and as he whips James Never Back Down Kid around the mat in this match, he talks trash with the best of them, pulling James' head up by his hair and taunting him, "Does it hurt?" clearly having found a new black space in his heart that savors physically controlling another man and making him squirm in pain.  I like that in a guy.

UCW was not kidding--or exaggerating--when recently it announced that significant changes were underway.  The volume has definitely been turned up for 2010.  The new league (still less than a year old) has never shied away from brutality, eroticism, pulchritude, and humor, and lately it's been breaking open whole new prototypes for not only itself, but for underground wrestling in general.  (Improvements continue, as UCW is now accepting donations through PayPal to buy a wrestling ring--and, for every donation of $25 or more, offering a gift of a video of a kickass four-corner tag match, which throws Black Dragon, James, Joker, and Klown together to see which fighter has it in him to rise to the top.  The way I see it the $25 is an investment in wrestling history, plain and simple.)

The Klown-versus-James fight is also a good showcase for James' talents, matching Klown mean for mean, insult for insult, and wedgy for wedgy.  James, one of two trainers working with the UCW fighters, has largely been eclipsed by younger talents with fresher faces and smoother pecs, but all that is changing now.  The hairy-chested hero is making a splash in a very big way in the latest batch of video downloads, notching his name up there with Klown and Joker as a likely contender for champ Axel's belt.  In fact, reportedly the champ himself has said that if anybody takes the title away from him, he hopes it will be James.

James and Klown's fight intensifies from one minute to the next, reaching a crescendo of fast-paced reversals, each one more wrenching and surprising than the last.  The familiar parameters of previous UCW product are still here:  real gut-punching, ball-snagging, body-slamming catch-as-catch-can wrestling, in a stark padded space--in this case, with no ref in sight--and no rules except, as boss Michael Tovar noted recently, "Don't kill each other."

I know I keep saying of each UCW release that it is the best one yet.  But I wouldn't be saying it if it were not true, each and every time.  Sure, I am admittedly a hardboiled fan of the league and its aggressive boy-next-door roster, and I wear my bias for it on my sleeve, but I have good reasons for being such a zealous fan.  This shit is really something special.  No doubt one day the growth spurt will stop and the quality will reach some kind of plateau, but for now UCW continues to amaze and captivate.  The matches are sexier, faster, busier, harder hitting, zanier, and nastier.  Tovar and his gang of roughnecks are delving into some primal emotions here, while at the same time managing to make it all look like cleancut all-American fun (which, hell, it is).


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