Friday, April 20, 2012

Underground Wrestling Drinking Game

It's springtime. It's the weekend. Time to kick back with some buddies after a hard week at work and play the Underground Wrestling Drinking Game. You deserve it. Your buddies deserve it. Plug in an underground wrestling video you have never seen before ... or pick one blindly out of your stack of favorites, and then follow the directions below. The object of the game is to get so sloshed that you strip down to your UnderGear and wrestle somebody in the backyard, while the most sober among you sprays the two (or more) combatants with the garden hose.



Take a drink each time you spot the following holds and moves: …

Armbar
Bear Hug
Boston Crab
Camel Clutch
Chinlock
Figure-Four Leglock
Fireman’s Carry
Full Nelson
Side Headlock
Sleeper (Rear Naked Choke)
Spladle
Surfboard



Take a drink every time an underground wrestler says these three little words,

“What you got?”
“You got nothin’.”
“C’mon, get up.”
"I'm not impressed."
“You like that?”
“Want some more?”
“You had enough?”
“Can’t hear you.”
“You got lucky.”
“Not so fast.”
“I’m not done.”
"Kiss that peak."



Take a drink every time an underground wrestler calls his opponent …

“Pretty Boy”
“Bitch”
“Champ”
“Tough Guy”
“Captain America” (an extra drink if the opponent is not wearing red, white, and blue gear)
“Faggot”
"Dumb jock"
“Asshole”
"Old man"
“Rookie”
“Jobber”
“Sir” (make that two drinks, you little bitch)



Take a drink every time the following things happen: …

Wrestler poses in front of a mirror.
Wrestler strikes a double bicep pose.
Wrestler leaps into the ring over the top rope.
Wrestler reclines across the corner top ropes.
Wrestler says his own name.
Wrestler punches opponent in the gut.
Wrestler kicks opponent in the gut.
Wrestler pulls opponent’s hair.
Wrestler pulls opponent’s trunks (an extra drink if you see crack or pubes).
Wrestler chokes opponent against a ring rope.
Wrestler powers out of a pin on the two-count.
Wrestler plants his foot (or boot) on opponent's face.



Take two drinks every time the following things happen: …

Wrestler throws fleeing opponent back into the ring (an extra drink for each rope that’s cleared).
Wrestler bites opponent.
Wrestler kisses opponent.
Wrestler gives opponent a wedgie.
Wrestler grabs opponent’s crotch.
Wrestler strips trunks off opponent.
Wrestler strangles opponent with stripped-off trunks.
Wrestler unmasks opponent.
The wrestlers move the action outside the ring (or off the mats).
Wrestler beats opponent, leaves the ring, but then returns on some pretext (such as “Hey, I forgot my favorite move”).
Winner carries loser off to someplace private.
And double-teaming, of course.


And remember: Wrestle Responsibly. And ask yourself WWJFD?


3 comments:

  1. it is just great to see picture after picture of austin cooper hurting

    ReplyDelete
  2. Might you add the ubiquitous "how's that feel?" to the list of phrases?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Jajajaja very good!

    ReplyDelete

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