Fantasy

Here's a tasty classic from 1995, in the midst of Can-Am's golden era, when talents like Tom Flex and Paul Perris reached their physical peaks. In Flex's Fantasy, Flex hangs against the corner ropes, slowly tugging his pud while intermittently wavy lines carry us off to his hottest wrestling fantasies. The main event pits him against Perris, the man with the highest kick and the prettiest ass cheeks at Can-Am. First they square off in singlets, then in tight phosphorescent trunks, and then finally in nothing but birthday suits and boots. (Nudity and boots, ka-ching: Joe's debit card gets a little bit lighter.)

Besides pitting together two of my favorite Can-Am wrestlers of all time, this match features plenty of hair-pulling and arm bars, not to mention, one, semi-erect cocks that wag like metronomes, two, Paul's garlic-and-paprika-steeped accent, and, three, some of the sweetest moans of agony in underground wrestling. As much as I love Perris's multiple bouts against his cousin Roman Stone--and they still remain my favorites,--in none of them did he ever pull his silky undies down off those dazzling, honey-tan buns. These guys give us more performance than actual wrestling, but, oh my, what a performance! The only thing that would have made this match better is if the stakes had been hair-versus hair. There was certainly enough of it flying around to make it a highlight of the contest. In the climactic finish, the victor chokes the loser off to Sleepy Town--it's slow and voluptuous, capping off a fine and memorable showdown.