Catch Me a Catch
Last month Zach Zilver's catastrophic face-off against Jonny Firestorm made my dirty dozen list of favorite matches in BG East's Demolition series. ZZ messaged me a few days later to say he was glad I liked the match, adding, "I'll bet you didn't like it as much as I enjoyed making it, though." The guy was trounced by only the company's top heel at the peak of his career (or one of several peaks); I don't doubt for a second he had a ball getting twisted into a thousand knots by Jonny. Zach says he reads this blog "religiously," noting (with a wink), "I'd have contacted sooner if you had mentioned one of my other matches." (I can make a bitch wait, if I mean to.)
The Firestorm job was about a decade ago. These days, Zach tells me, though he "still theoretically wrestle[s]," he's too far from the BGE hubs to see much ring action, unfortunately. He's been "itching for a rematch ever since ... and let me tell you, if I ever got a rematch, it'd end up going even worse for me than that one." If anything, Jonny is nastier, stronger, and more potentially destructive than ever before. Zach's looking to get back into wrestling in the next year, motivated by his resolution not to buy any new wrestling gear until he uses what he already has.
A few days ago he wrote back:
since i like how your mind works [well, that's not healthy], given no temporal or geographic restrictions, who would you like to see me take on? what kind of matches?
Maybe it's my inner shadchan, but I'm more than happy to play matchmaker for Zach or any other fetching grappler looking to get his ass smashed or to put the hurts on somebody else. Here's my carefully considered response:
I gave this some thought. What popped first in my mind, time and space being no object, was a cage match with Andy Flyer. Then, more obvious and not requiring time travel, Kid Karisma and Eli Black, Kid in (and out) of a ring, Eli on the mat. Kid K, I suspect, would give you a permanent limp. Sorry, haha. Paul Hudson could then put you out of commission in a Demolition match.
Zach responded to say he approved of my picks, though he wasn't aware that Paul Hudson had a heel side. Perhaps not against his bigger opponents, but I think Chip Chang, Len Harder, Jonah Richards, Tim Sheridan, TJ Tanner, and Tommy Troup would probably testify to the man's pronounced heel tendencies, at least. I'm sure Paul would be happy to sharpen his skills further on Zilver. Zach also said,
i'd love a cage match with any of them, in fact. Kid K is one of my favorites, and i'd be down for just about any match possible involving him ... including taking on him and eli black at the same timeIn retrospect, I think I should have made a longer list. It would also be fun to watch ole Zach tumbling in the Wrestleshack with Gil or Gabriel or the two Jakes ... or all four in a pile-on. Any of you other readers got some recommendations for ZZ?
|Zach Zilver, 5'6", 135#, likes quiet evenings at home, walks on the beach, and asphyxiation.|
|I don't know what Andy, 5'6", 165#, is up to these days, but he's got legit UK pro experience, a cherub-gone-bad face to match Zach's, and a taste for roughhouse.|
|If Zach wants a serious dusting off, he can do no better than Kid K, 5'8", 170#|
|Eli, 5'6", 135#, is a perfect match for Zach in height and weight|
|Paul Hudson, 5'7", 145#, might be willing to contribute to a Kickasser.com fundraising campaign to make sure Zach gets the new gear and the whipping he needs|
|Gil Barrios, 5'9", 165#, never fails to make wrestling look sexy and fun|
|Jake Lowe, 5'5", 135#, is a unique blend of sugar rush and lethal injection|
|Gabriel Ross, 5'4", 135#, the "kissing bandit," wants to strip Zach naked and knock him the fuck out|