Cheeky

I owe Gary big this week. First SexRock. Then Shane Haste. Now this! This is Progress Wrestling, bringing "strong style" wrestling to UK fans, with a FREE 2+ hour show on YouTube, shot this past May in London. (You can find other DVDs, downloads, and merchandise for sale on the company's website.) As Gary promised, the cinematography and editing are first rate (even though we get this show for free because of some technical difficulties), the crowd is stoked, and then the high point of the show (for Gary and me) is the match between the archly malevolent Prince Devitt ("his usual -10% body fat" and "in Joker makeup mode") and the brilliant Zach Sabre Jr--"tanned and lean (and gorgeous)." The UK and Australia seem to be vying for top spot as the smartest, sexiest, most jaw-dropping wrestling show on video. The Prince can't be heel enough to get this crowd to boo him. They love him. On his back is scrawled the statement "We stop looking for monsters under the bed when we realize they're inside of us." That's certainly a good summary of the appeal of pro-style heels for most fans. (Admittedly, the "face" in this instance finds sadistic enjoyment in busting the ligaments of Devitt's fingers, so it might be a tossup as to who's the bigger heel and the bigger monster.)

An addendum:

I don't like ladder matches, so I'm going to cede the floor to Gary, who does, to tell you about his latest find, a tag-team championship match featuring our new favorite Aussie wrestler, Shane Haste. Having watched the match, I will say it is just as fast paced and extreme as Gary describes it, and the 16:24 spot belongs with the header "Cheeky." Ladder fans, feast your eyes!

I guess I'll save the best for last: 

This is an EPW Tag Title Championship Ladder Match from ReAwakening 8 (4 years ago). The commentator, Marcus Pitt, says this was the the first time Shane Haste and Mikey Nicholls came together as TMDK. They're up against the current champs, Slex and Carlo Cannon. Not many views, so I'm guessing this was just posted. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8qo6OfLLg8 

You will need a trip to the chiropractor, just from watching this match. 

Two guys do a colorful commentary and I'm putting some of their comments in quotes. 

They keep describing the match as "brutal," and that it is. Almost 23 minutes of mayhem (no blood). The match takes place before an ecstatic, sold out crowd. 

Four men and some "unforgiving steel ladders." At some point after the ladders arrive in the ring, Shane is spread-eagled in the corner and Slex viciously slams the top of the ladder into his crotch. There's no way this didn't hurt. Shane spins his head around and spits onto the ring apron. Then Carlo arrives in the ring, after trashing Mikey outside the ring. They immediately open the ladder and do a "double drop kick, sending the ladder into the manhood of Shane Haste." Shane and Mikey are scoop slammed and sandwiched every which way into the ladders, but the bad guys also get their share of contact with the metal. Trying to outdo Slex, I guess, Carlo comes up and gives Shane a "vicious boot to the groin." 

The best scene comes at 16:24. Shane is struggling up the ladder. Carlo's hand appears, grabs the back of his trunks, and exposes Shane's bare butt. It looks like he has some sort of tattoo on his right cheek. Beautiful stuff. The commentator's remark, "Shane Haste, who gives his full moon to the crowd there." 

Immediately following this, Shane goes up top to make a leap and Carlo "crotches him on that top rope. Shane Haste is going to need a lot of ice when this match is done." Mikey brings the ladder into the corner and Slex ends up on top of Carlo in "a compromising position." Basically 69ing each other. The commentators joke, "They seem to have been obsessed with Shane Haste's crotch all night, so it seems only fitting that they end up in that position." 

All participants should get some award for this match. A real work of art. The only downside is, I think everything I watch from now on will pale in comparison.