Marky Mark vs Troy Gulezian, Fantasymen 9* (BG East)
A guy who smiles while wrestling is sexy to me. I mean a real smile, not a sneer, not a come-hitcher smirk, not an embarrassed admission of self-consciousness. I mean a gee-this-is-a-lot-of-fun smile. Marky Mark is a good enough wrestler, but what makes him sexy as fuck is the breezy way he cuts through a match. Whether it's oil-wrestling Cruze at the Paradise, squaring off against Dan Donovan in the ring, or, here, mat-wrestling Troy Gulezian, he looks frisky and fun-loving. It's not that he doesn't take wrestling seriously. The wrestling is competitive--aggressive, skillful, fast. Mark is just one of those guys who like rough and tumble, and he shows it. Of course, he doesn't smile all the time. A wrestler like Gulezian can wipe the smile off Mark's face, temporarily, that is, until Mark turns the tables on him. In a fight a smile can be disarming, especially when it doesn't look overtly aggressive. It means not only "I like to fight," but also "I'm gonna enjoy beating you up."
*This match is not listed in the catalog, but it is included on the DVD you buy.
Kid Brandon vs Jeremy, Brothers 2 (PWP)
Jeremy and Brandon aren't the brothers the title refers to. Brandon's brother is Jay, but that's a confrontation that comes later in the video. The brotherly betrayal angle is what drew me to purchase this DVD years ago (I have a thing for brothers, having never had one), but the match I keep returning to is this one, the opener. I can't count the number of times I have said that wrestling skill is more important to me than beauty. It's true too. All things being equal, I'd rather watch two unattractive guys who know how to wrestle than two hot hunks who cannot. There are exceptions. This is one. Kid Brandon is not a particularly good wrestler. He's not even exceptionally well built or manly in the way that usually attracts me. But he is pretty ... and he shows enthusiasm and high spirits on the wrestling mat. I figure he was of legal age when he shot this video, but he looks young: pearly teeth, rosy lips, and a hint of baby fat here and there. I'll admit it: the closest I will ever be to pedophilia is the pleasure I find in watching pretty boys wrestle. I don't want to wrestle them, and I don't want to see them wrestle anybody but another young boy. (As revealed elsewhere, sometimes I have the same atypical attraction for women wrestlers.) In every other context, I'm not attracted to anyone who looks younger than 18, even if they're actually older, but if they like to wrestle, well, that is sometimes a different story.
Dazzlin' Dick Durning vs Chizzled Chip Chambers, Season 1, Episode 5 (Twin City Wrestling)
Chizzled Chip, in black trunks with multicolored lightning bolts, expends a lot of energy in being unimpressed with the tough-as-nails TCW champion Dazzlin' Dick (or trying to appear unimpressed). As the Nova Scotia crowd clamors for Dick, Chip facetiously twirls his whoopdidoo finger. Fans mock the challenger's hubris in thinking he can take the belt; Dick is obviously too much man for Chip. Things start out clean, both wrestlers demonstrating their catch-wrestling finesse, energized by churning undercurrents of animosity. Then shortly before the 7 minute mark, we see Chambers slap Durning across the face. That raises the ruckus up a couple of notches, and Dick lays into Chip like a tornado on a double-wide, inside the ring and out. It's a satisfying beatdown of the mama's-boy, but Chip has tricks up his sleeve, and he won't be easily got rid of. This is not "sports entertainment," but (as TCW boasts) "professional wrestling." It's also hot hot hot. The escalating fury and barrels of testosterone culminate in an impressive spine-cracking finisher.