A Shining Example

Joe Robbins vs Damien Rush, Demolition 23 (BG East)

Joe Robbins is solider than ever, more sure of himself, more chiseled - and he breaks into a full flow of sweat in the opening test of strength against bad little rich boy Damien Rush. No wonder he's my man of the moment, well deserving of a good American name like Joe

Rush is the heel here, big talker, daddy's boy (he claims his father just bought him the BGE ring), cowardly when an opponent isn't bowled over by his masterly veneer (hairy chested, close-cropped hair, big talk). Given the one-sided beating Joe dishes up on Damien, some might say he's the real heel here, but Rush's pushiness and swagger earn him every bit of the grandiose licking Robbins delivers.

Naturally, a fan of the working man like me is bound to cream his pants over this match. Damien embodies all I detest - smug, superior, flashy, derisive, privileged: he's an Ayn Rand wet dream, dickless as a Ken doll, and he just stepped in the ring against a 100-percent man's man. Joe has no compunction about stomping him into mat, body-slamming him, pounding him into the turnbuckle, stripping him down to a g-string, snapping his spinal column - in and out of the ring - and smiles as he does it.

This match pushes all my buttons, thanks to a two-bit phony who gorgeously sells his rightful agonies and a cool, calm, and collected knight who pinches the guy's head tight-shut - verrry slowly and oh so devastatingly.

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  1. Hey, Joe. I adore Joe Robbins. I am not altogether sure why, although being called "Joe" sure helps... He is beefy and manly, of course. But not the beefiest out there. Handsome, but not the prettiest ever. Sweaty? Always my weakness for sure. Not the best wrestler. But I have always just been enthralled by watching him. Perhaps it is the tantalizing possibility that a stud still waiting for his comruppance will get it in the end.

    As we have discussed before, the release of BGE matches occurs completely outside the realm of the normal space-time continuum. For all we know, Joe Robbins fought his last match in the Hoover administration. But, in my dream world, Joe would be reset in a more current world versus the likes of Guido Gennato and Brute Baynard. New-style sweaty brawn vs. Old-school sweaty brawn. I also wouldn't mind seeing him torture a few blasts from the past like my beloved Mikey Vee, or the too-perfect-to-be-true Kid Karisma.

    I am certain that we will not likely ever see that happen, but still. One of the cursed blessings of BGE's habit of sitting on matches for unknown lengths of time is the possibillity- however unlikely- that such a gem exists, and will come bursting forth into our lives one day. Here's to hoping! In the meanwhile, I'll pour myself a tall drink of water like Joe Robbins...


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