New Kid

Guido Genatto vs Kid Titan, Demolition 23 (BG East)

Kid Titan is Dirty Guido's biggest BGE opponent to date. Guido's heavier, but here his weight  advantage is far less than it was against cutie pies like Ty Alexander, Kirk Donahue, and Jake Jenkins. Still, it's not going to be an easy ride for Titan. He carries some sumptuous bulk, but in the end he's still a rookie squaring off against the company's meanest heel - and by meanest  I mean, of course, the most awesome.

Titan is surprisingly quick on the offense. That's not something you see every day. Most of Guido's opponents - especially newcomers - approach the magnificently hairy heel with guarded hesitation. Sadly, the impressive opening volley is almost all Titan gets. Guido is moderately impressed with his opponent's gumption, but payback is sure, swift, and merciless. The Kid gets his hope shot early - too early - and then, in a flurry of squeezes, stretches, yanks, and slams, all hope vanishes.

The ring suits Titan more than the mat. His thick build and imposing butt are custom built for suplexes and Irish whips. His bland good looks would equally befit a dungeon master or military man. He has the makings of an amazing bully, but here he faces the Dirty Daddy of All Bullies, a man who would give pause to Biff Tannen. "How does it feel to be completely trapped?" Guido taunts, while making Titan's sweaty body quiver for the camera. The Kid suffers exquisitely, even ecstatically; at one point while Genatto is killing him against the turnbuckle, he smarts off, saying, "It feels great!" I don't doubt his sincerity for a second, but I also suspect he would relish being the tormentor more, a chance he gets when he catches Guido mid-flight in an assured and tormenting 23-second bear hug. Retribution is speedy, as Guido then snaps his neck like a Sunday chicken and reverses the hold.

Two big lugs going at it like cavemen is my aphrodisiac of choice. It is sexy and daunting by turns. Old-school masculinity has fascinated me since I was a big-boned, large-for-my-age sissy growing up on US military bases across the USA and abroad. It's something I never had and never will have, except as a fantasy. Big louts often have gentle souls - their imposing physiques and manliness do all the work for them - but I love it when they play the brute and ravage each other.

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