Battle of the Bulges













Tyson takes on the UCW champ without a ref, which means technically this can't be a championship match, but Tyson's performance here is championship material through and through as he gives Angel the hardest challenge of his reign. Angel rises to the occasion, delivering some of the most vicious punishments of his career (which is really saying something).

From the beginning, this fight is all about bulges. Both wrestlers wear the rhinocerean trunks Axel popularized a few years ago, and with no ref, all manner of physical abuse is permitted. (As UCW fans know, all manner of abuse is permitted even if there are twelve refs in the ring.) Biting, foreign objects, ball-wrenching, nothing is off limits. Killing an opponent used to be the only prohibition, but that rule flew out the window when Axel slew Eli Black in the late spring of '17.

Most of the action stays in or around the ring, but at the midpoint, after Tyson delivers a heinous knee-jab to Angel's groin, Angel grabs his championship belt and flees. Tyson tackles him at the mats, delivering a merciless thrashing before snatching the belt and returning it to the ring. The champ follows and leaps from the top ropes (a pro move seldom seen in underground wrestling anywhere) to strike the Hammer from behind.

Angel uses the belt's medallion to further brutalize his opponent, The match's final ten minutes are hairy as fuck - even for a promotion that celebrates hairy outbursts of violence. The ball torture is relentless all the way to a shocker climax that involves a groin hoist and body slam from which the victim cannot recover. It's a killer ending to a match that finds both wrestlers at peak performance. 


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