Hungry Like

Jessie Lee vs Wolf Boy in Thongs, Match 662 (UCW)

Standard trunks slide off shortly before this match's midpoint, leaving Wolf Boy and Jessie in thongs. The thermometer swells at this pivotal point in the contest, and though some transitions are needed to string the moves together, the moves themselves hum, independent of what happens before and after. Wolf Boy is definitely the man in charge here - confident and daring. In fact, Wolf Boy plunges so deep into character that he could be bouncing around a ring full of mannequins and the effect would be riveting..(For the record, I think the buzz cut suits him. In fact, had Jessie visited the same barber, I think the fight would have looked twice as rowdy.)

Without totally writing off the first 13 minutes (of 28), I have to say things start really popping when buttocks see light, so I recommend fast-forwarding to the 13:15 mark. Shoulders and backs start to glisten. Wolf Boy monkey-flips Lee. Lee delivers the keys to Fist City to WB. When Jessie elevates his perfect buns to get on top of Wolfy, my knees go a tiny bit weak. Lee needs to smile less - or if he must smile, show incisors and gums - and call up his demons if he expects to put the Wolf Boy down. You don't defeat Wolf Boy until you make the pain your friend. As usual at UCW, pain and the wrestlers are besties.

What distinguishes UCW from most other underground wrestling sites is that, though safety precautions are taken, the wrestlers throw punches that land and take to the mat with the intention of hurting their opponent. The pink blushes on Jessie's otherwise flawless skin are evidence that these boys are not performing a ballet. This is the old-school roughhouse of barracks and basements - and the virility leaves a penetrating smell in the air.

Visit UCW here.