Thursday, October 23, 2014

Shark!











Here are some of the many faces and tonsorial stylings (and one swell bod) of Chris "The Shark" Andrews, 5'10", 224#, 30-year-old wrestler from Devon, England, currently active at WrestleForce and Swiss Wrestling Zone, where he can be watched (here on YouTube) in combat against the excessively well-groomed Magic Sly in a match from this past April.

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Gay Chicken














In ThunderTV's recent release, Bear challenges Logan to a game of gay chicken: straight guy challenging another straight guy to kiss, the chicken being the guy who cringes and backs off first. Bear says it's not much different than wrestling a guy. Logan draws close, but can't quite make himself lock lips with Bear. So Bear suggests a little body worship as a warmup exercise. 

Logan's okay with this, since, he says, rubbing a guy's muscle is a little closer to wrestling, you know, "regular guy stuff." Then Bear coaxes Logan into kissing his hairy chest, telling him to just pretend he's kissing "a furry something else." Logan gets it on with Bear's pec for a few seconds, but then suddenly backs off, repulsed, claiming he's straight and can't go the hairy tit route either.

Bear threatens to force Logan into kissing him on the mouth. The sex predator vibe is a little on the strong side (not to mention the inherent homophobia of the game), but it's all in fun. Logan is just playing a role here. And so is Bear. I trust the guys at Thunders Arena. And I'm a kinkster, besides. I too have acted out rape fantasies with a boyfriend and got off on them. I get the appeal. It's naughty, and it touches on deep-seeded desires and fears."Oh God it's gross," Logan protests. But he is smiling the whole time. 

Bear raises the perfectly valid point that saying "it's gross" is not the same thing as saying "no." He bends Logan over and gives the guy a quick spanking. "You wanna get rough?" Bear asks him, with a hint of mischief in his expression. "Thunders knows I like it rough."

Logan looks game, and the two start wrestling. On command, Logan kisses Bear's cannonball biceps. Bear then puts Logan in several compromising positions that resemble the positions we often see in pro wrestling and gay porn alike. Ringside at Skull Island is built almost entirely on such similarities (just check out the banner above). 

Bear moves the contest outside, at poolside, the sun having set. The visual double entendres continue, poking fun at the idea that, as so many wrestlers and wrestling fans claim, there's nothing even remotely erotic about wrestling--not "real" wrestling anyway. It also pokes fun--"poke" being the operative word--at the notion of straight guys playing gay "for pay" (or "on a dare"), but denying that some part of them likes it (or is at least bi-curious).

"I can see why you enjoy dominating so much," Logan tells Bear later, after turning the tables on him, "it's kinda fun!" The wrestlers crisscross roles of dominant and submissive, gay and straight, sex and roughhouse many times in this 25-minute tease, making this ThunderTV's slyest and most subversive match to date. 

The finish is a hot and wet (and wholly consensual) kiss on the lips, but, of course, it's imperative for the victor to refer to it as a "kiss of death," because these guys are straight (right?) and totally grossed out by gay stuff. 

But, ooh ooh ooh, what a little moonlight can do!


Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Big Brother












Eli Black calls dibs on breaking in young, wide-eyed Vincent Stone. Eli says he trained the kid, introduced him to UCW, and been "like a big brother to him." Vincent is ferret-slim, the sort of victim Eli likes to torment most (like Jack Marino, Johnny Deep, and Jax before him). Vincent seems happy enough to oblige: When Black tells him he's about to get his ass kicked, Vincent grins back and says he's looking forward to it.

And so am I. But I have to wait since Vincent starts off like gangbusters against the ex-champ, giving big brother something to get steamed up over, and God knows I enjoy a steamed-up Eli Black. About three-quarters through this match [#375], Vincent pulls a foreign object out of his trunks to gain an unsporting advantage over Black--proof positive in my book that Eli did in fact train him.

Black is the man of a thousand holds, a third of them strictly forbidden by any wrestling rulebook. But he has more moves than just about anybody else at UCW. Midway through this match, while keeping Vincent hogtied so he can chat up the fans, Eli invites us to drop him a line via UCW fanmail and request moves we haven't seen at UCW in a while. (I'd be interested in a cannonball senton.)  BodySlam says you either love Eli or hate him, but I can't do one without doing the other too, just a reaction the guy draws out of some people, I reckon. 

Eli has charisma out the wazoo. He shines on camera. He's one of those wrestlers who make me smile every second the camera is on them. For one thing Eli is always "on." There's not a moment in any Eli Black match that he's not in the moment. Sometimes you see other wrestlers work up a response or emotion two or three seconds too late. You won't catch Eli Black not emoting. He emotes every second of a match, projecting rage, pain, confusion, arrogance, you name it, and never a half-second out of sync with the action. The guy's a natural, and I gotta love him ... and (mostly) hate him.


Monday, October 20, 2014

22 New Screen Grabs of Mark Lander























This one doesn't end well for Mark Lander, but fans might rightly claim that this 66-minute private submission contest is one of his best. Venrick is an atypical opponent in successfully submitting Lander, and not just once. Still, the bout features some of Lander's best mat work.

Among the great skinny wrestlers I have watched and reported on in this blog, Lander remains the greatest, in my opinion. He has an undeniable mystique. His face is childlike and jaded at the same time. The faraway look he gets in his eyes when he is cutting off his opponent's oxygen, most of the time in most other matches, is seductive and a bit scary.

Lander and Venrick never relent in this heated, measured contest of skills and wills. It's almost as if they cannot stop.  About midway through, their faces look swollen and puffy as if they have just been boiled alive, a startling indication of the mutual erosion of their energy and spirit. Yet they persist, recklessly going beyond the edge of normal endurance.

The circumstances and dating of Lander's "Let's Wrestle" matches are as mysterious as Lander's Mona Lisa smile, which is detectable at those moments when he has absolute mastery of the twitching body in his grip. I came to Lander's work only after the site had closed, so many of you know more about him and this particular match than I do. The homemade disk I have credits Lander's opponent as "TJ Venrick," but I can't verify the name or determine whether this wrestler is Kyle Venrick, identified elsewhere. 

Cunning, merciless, and, for long stretches, deadlocked, this fight is for fans of chokes, scissors, and endless tight clenches.

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