The Idea of It Being That

Here are a few scenarios that really light up my bulbs:

Punk newcomer oversteps his bounds with a slightly older pro and throws a few punches early in a match.  The pro controls the newcomer, locking up his arms, incapacitating him, and then proceeds, for the sheer hell of it, to give the newcomer a taste of his own medicine.

Two best friends decide to bar no holds and see just how far they can take things by kicking the ever-loving shit out of each other and in the process create a deeper, kinkier bond with one another.

Quiet, unassuming newcomer takes on the local bully.  At first the bully has his way with the newcomer, but then it turns out that the newcomer is just holding back, waiting for the bully to show his hand, revealing his true colors.  Right when the bully thinks he’s invincible, though, the newcomer teaches him a lesson he will not forget.

Ref clearly favors one fighter (red corner) over another (blue corner).  After a long, wearying match in which blue corner guy has clearly pinned red corner guy three or four times already, but ref has counted too slowly each time—and maybe even once pushed red’s foot onto the ring rope to call for a break and separate the fighters—blue loses his cool, tosses red clear out of the ring, and starts wailing the tar on ref.

Villain turns against villain.  No blow is too low.  Let the baddest badass win.

After gym class, chubby kid starts flicking his towel at skinny kid’s ass in the shower room.  Skinny gives chubby a warning, but when chubby can’t resist one more snap, skinny goes nuts and starts punching.  The two go at it, naked as jaybirds, in the spray of a dozen showerheads as their classmates clear out.  The fight escalates and stops only when chubby is a blubbering, bloody-nosed mess, cowering over the burbling drain.

Lovers wrestle for top in the bedroom.

[With thanks—and apologies*—to Bard at Neverland] Boyfriends versus boyfriends tag-team action in the wrestling arena tonight!  A and B, lovers, face off against C and D, lovers, and, coincidentally exes of A and B.  Sure, the level of coincidence staggers the imagination, but, oh, what a fight is at hand!  At first, A squares off against his ex, C, and then B squares off against his ex, D.  Various permutations ensue, with C and D double-teaming on A, leading to all four fighters slugging it out.  In the end, A beats up B’s ex, and B beats up A’s ex, and the climax occurs as A and B embrace and kiss, while kneeling on the heads of the vanquished C and D.  [“Apologies” because Bard’s scenario was a simpler and purer version of this travesty, whereas I’ve pressed it past the edge of tenability.]


  1. You're very welcome, and no need at all to apologize. You've done some sweet extrapolating. My mind can't help filling in the formulas (A=..., B=..., etc.).


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