Saturday, May 11, 2013

Team X

These guys may never be my friends. They may be too tough and prickly to cuddle. Their muscle is not for show. They are not the Greek god types--or, if they are, the god is Ares, god of war (Romans called him Mars). Ares was the epitome of the Greek idea of aggressive energy. Not one to gloss over the ugly effects of war and violence, Homer characterized Ares as "devastating Ares," "baleful Ares," and "brazen Ares." (All references to The Iliad, a book-length poem about war and rage--yeah, I've been working on lesson plans.) Not the easiest men to live with, warriors nevertheless exude a certain irksome appeal, chronicled from Gilgamesh to Iron Man 3. These guys, big and small, are wrecking balls. They destroy. 

Today's theme is wrestlers whose hotness factor is 90% or more based on pugnacity.  These are the guys you want in your corner in a fight, but not necessarily guys you invite to a pajama-party-slash-all-night-Streisand-marathon. You hire them as bodyguards to clear a path through crowds for you if you are rich enough, or in my 007 fantasies of arch-villainy, they're my henchmen. (I like pretty, too, by the way, and charming, and funny, smart, cute, sensual, and adventurous, just so you know my tastes in men have several facets, even though my blog posts tend to fixate--analytically, perhaps obsessively--with one or only a few at a time.) In pro wrestling, Dory Funk Jr., "Stone Cold" Steve Austin, and Bill Goldberg personify rage and the power to destroy. In movies, Harry Callahan, John Rambo, and John McClane.  I collected my examples here from BG East's pay-site The Arena, because BGE still has, indisputably, the choicest hellraisers. These are the guys, when at last I'm set to forge my evil empire, I want to surround me in tight Armani suits. (The rest of you, be at my place at ten--we're starting with Funny Girl.)

Mikey Vee

Joe Mazetti

Dev Michaels

Nick Archer

Dave Christian

Casey Cutler

Kid Karisma

Brooklyn Bodywrecker

Dane Tarsen


Eddy Rey

Cole Cassidy


  1. If time travel is part of the deal and I can get guys in their prime, Clint Morgan would be the top of my list. Other than when he ran into the wall against Dark Rogers, he always seemed unstoppable.

    Skotch English and The Enforcer would also make my list, with Skotch being in charge of training my henchman. Bulldog Barzini would be around as the lovable stooge-like tough guy.

    Is that really Shane McCall? I wouldn't have recognized him without the caption.

    1. I like your choices, Alex. Get nine more and our henchmen can have a battle royale. I don't remember Clint, but I looked him up and now I'm interested in catching up. And, yeah, I'm pretty certain that is Shane McCall in the photo--though your question now raises a doubt.

    2. I think that is Casey Cutler instead of Shane McCall

    3. Damn! You're right! Correction made, thanks to your and Alex's sharp eyes. I even have the match Casey wore those purple trunks in. My apologies to Casey and Shane, both worthy of henchmanship.

    4. Man totally agree with this list!

  2. I only have a couple of early Clint matches against Dark Rogers and BBW, but he had a great attitude for your list.

    And I can't turn down a challenge, especially when it involves thinking about BGE studs in a Battle Royale. I tried to think about different eras and sizes, as you did. I'm not sure all these guys fit your criteria exactly, but if I was upping my list to 12 bad boys who aren't on your list (several of yours would be on my list, for sure), I think I would look at:

    Bulldog Barzini
    Trent Blayze
    Cage Thunder
    Morgan Cruise
    Skotch English
    Clint Morgan
    Beau Nasty
    Aryx Quinn
    Vinny Trevino

    1. Hm. I see Kid K taking out Beau and Aryx singlehandedly and pretty fast. But Nick Archer bumps chests with Jose, and then the battle gets interesting.

  3. I was glad to see Clint Morgan named in a couple of these posts. He was a true phenomenon and in particular, his two matches with Bryan Walsh, first on Private Bouts 81-84 and then the follow-up and rather astonishingly brutal rematch on Demolition 2, are among best ring matches of BG East 90's.

    Kid Leopard



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