Medieval Madness

SPOILERS!

The biggest name in Deathstalker (1983, dir. John Watson) is Barbi Benton, Playboy model and Hugh Hefner's girlfriend for half of the '70s. The biggest reason to watch Deathstalker is the fights to the death at the end of the movie - beginning with Deathstalker (Richard Hill) taking on his best friend, Oghris (Richard Brooker), who has betrayed him into the hands of an evil wizard. Here's the Wikipedia summary of this scene:

It is revealed that Oghris brought Deathstalker to the tournament expressly for Munkar [the wizard] and he is ordered to kill him. Reluctant to kill his friend, Oghris warns Deathstalker and asks the hero to just leave the tournament but Deathstalker refuses and attacks him. During the brawl, Oghris has the chance to draw the sword [it's magical] and kill Deathstalker but chooses to fight fairly and ultimately loses. Deathstalker says goodbye to the fighter and kills him.

The fact that a third of the fight occurs on a bed makes the scene's eroticism incontestable. Add points for the oiled up torsos, and we know for damn sure it's as gay as show tunes. And the sword ... the magic sword*. Clearly we are not in Tolkien territory, and I find the movie as a whole unwatchable, but I can imagine worse ways to die than at the climax of a sweaty fight with a blond muscleman. For the record, when I say I would like to die in bed, this is what I'm talking about.

* "[T]he male organ ... has symbolical substitute in objects of like form, those which are long and upright, such as sticks, umbrellas, poles, trees, etc. It is also symbolized by objects that have the characteristic, in common with it, of penetration into the body and consequent injury, hence pointed weapons of every type, knives, daggers, lances, swords, ...."  Sigmund Freud, A General Introduction to Psychoanalysis (1920)