Hunk Bashes Hunk

Damien Rush vs Biff Farrell, Hunkbash 21 (BG East)

The new BG East catalog does not keep which hunk bashes which a secret. There's not a single shot of Farrell with the upper hand, nor is there one in the large stash of additional photos in the Arena Galleries, from which I draw the images above. It is, after all, a "bash" - distinct from a "fight" or a "contest" in its one-sidedness. Clearly from the beginning, before  the beginning, we know Rush cleans Farrell's clock. The suspense, if any, lies in discovering which hold or assault will be the deathblow. 

I speed through the muscle poses and arm wrestling - yadda yadda yadda - in search of what I like, which is prolonged and strenuous body contact. (We all like what we like.) The opening shot serves up Biff's bountiful body like a Christmas ham. As he poses for the camera and mirror, he's a feast for the eyes, but my main impulse is to pounce. His is a body designed to be played with, stretched, twisted, punched, squeezed. As I have said elsewhere on this blog, he is a man-sized Stretch Armstrong doll. (Oh, if only.) The 05:35 mark gets me where I want to be. Damien tries to sucker him into a handshake, but Biff doesn't fall for it - he ducks under a hook punch and body-slams the guy. When Rush gets up, Farrell clotheslines him, then pulls him up in a full nelson, opening his hairy chest and taut drumhead abdominals for the camera and me.

I'm a Biff man myself, but Damien's animal magnetism is undeniable. Part of the deal at BG East is the body-beautifuls get stretched out and displayed like Persian rugs so fans like me get their eyeful of the hunk who's bashed. Two minutes later, Damien reverses with a nasty low blow and performs this service on Biff. Basically, Damien does everything to Biff that I wish I could do to Biff. It helps that Rush's resume includes dungeon master experience, and Farrell's early history involved getting beat up by one wrestler after another. (I keep hoping each rare win signals a winning streak for the all-American hunk, but then we get something like this that pulls him back to jobbing.)

For the next 28 minutes, Damien makes Biff suffer and suffer big - and Biff suffers beautifully: Damien makes sure of it, thrusting the man's sculptural pecs and belly and agonized face to the camera. Rush works Farrell through a drawn-out Kama Sutra of pain. He makes most spectacular use of the ropes to pin Biff in place so that he can work some joint or tendon into some unnatural position of anguish. Around the 16-minute mark, Damien has worked up a sweat, and over time it spreads to Biff. There is no room for even the tiniest hope spot for our hero.

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