Pretty Boys Are Fresh Meat for Heels

Jonny Firestorm and Gabe Steel vs Tony Angeles and Vinny Vigo, Hunkbash 29 (BG East)

In underground wrestling, tag teams are rare, but when you see them, you're more than likely at BG East. In poses and tight trunks Tony (shimmering blue) and Vinny (iron-gray) are epic. Firestorm and Steel will find them to be tougher challenges than expected, surprisingly capable as masters and artists of ring wrestling. But Firestorm and Steel are ornery and powerful toughs, who have witnessed their share of beauteous brawn and squashed them into pulp.

Our fancy boys flex their biceps and suck in their stomachs. "Fresh meat," says Firestorm at ringside. "Pretty boys," says Steel, rubbing his palms together in anticipation. Jonny wears black; Gabe, bright green. Firestorm asks, "Which one do you want?" as if picking a ribeye at the butcher shop. Steel wants Tony. Standing on the ring apron, Jonny and Gabe decide on a ring name: "Tigerbashing." "You're all mine," Gabe tells Tony, and they lock collar and elbow.

Gabe takes Tony down to the mat in a side headlock, plants his boots on Tony's shoulders and tears at his arms, then scissors his head between his massive thighs. He then trades Tony off on Jonny, who bounds into the ring and locks the newbie in an arm bar. When he yanks Tony's hair, Vinny dives into the ring and lands on Jonny's gut. Jonny tries to work his way to Gabe to tag. Vinny won't let him, grinning mischievously as he stretches Jonny.

Vinny dominates Jonny for a minute and tosses him to Gabe, who climbs in, all smiles. Gabe fails to subdue Vinny, though he roughs him up. Vinny tags in Tony, who gets Gabe in a tight chokehold. When Gabe turns on him, Tony rushes to tag the anxious Vinny in. Vinny squeezes Gabe in a ribs-crunching bear hug, but Jonny attacks from behind. Less than eight minutes in, and chaos reigns. All four wrestlers pitch in for arousing double-teaming on both sides.

The heated battle consists of two-on-one bullying and knockdown drag-outs with all four in the squared circle. Halfway through the match, Angeles and Vigo choke out both Firestorm and Steel. It's great seeing the handsome young studs triumph over the hotshot bad guys, but how long can they sustain their advantage? (Not for long, I suspect.) A series of low blows brings all four wrestlers back into the ring. Sweat dampens the air, and the slaughter escalates to a steamy double-choke ending.

Visit BG East here.