Kicking Cousins

Kirk Donahue vs Jakob Rawley, Hunkbash 30 (BG East)

Jakob is new to BG East. He expected this to be a tag-team event, with him partnering with his cousin Kirk. Or maybe not. "I've been at this for a while," Kirk tells him. "I don't know if you got what it takes. I don't want to take on somebody that'll, you know, bring me down." Jakob is displeased with Kirk's cavalier way of brushing him off. As he sees it, he's been proving his wrestling ability side by side with Donahue his whole life. And he's sure he can beat Kirk in a fair fight.

They lock arms, and Jakob shoves Kirk into the corner ropes. Kirk claims to have been caught off-guard. Jakob kicks Kirk in the gut. He has pluck, this guy, quite a nasty temper, too. Kirk is still on all fours as Jakob reaches down and flips him over, clumsily, recklessly putting Kirk in position to catch Jakob in a head scissors. Kirk clings to the bottom rope, breaking the rules. Kirk lets go, and the two are barely on their feet when Kirk's heel smashes Jakob's chest, driving his butt to the mat. 

This is betrayal, but Donahue has turned to treachery plenty of times over the past four years. Blood relatives turning on each other gets me hard, I admit, all the more so when the meaner of the two has a baby face. Kirk doesn't wait for Jakob to recover. He snaps a side headlock on. The plot gets stickier as Kirk resorts to all-out cheating (his fingers crossed behind his back). Jakob fights fire with fire. For the next ten minutes, Jakob beats the shit out of Kirk, and Kirk beats the shit out of Jakob.

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