Ghosts of Christmas Nasty
El Fuego vs TK Wu vs Eli Black vs Derrick Cole, Match 636 - Holiday Match 2018 (UCW)
Best. Holiday. Match. Ever.
And one of the best matches ever of any season. These four guys are at their physical peaks. Perfection, in other words.
In the spirit of the season, fresh recruits Fuego and TK introduce themselves to each other, shaking hands, exchanging holiday greetings. In a flash, Eli blindsides them both, ringing the decorative bell with Fuego's noggin.
Just like that, balls swell to twice their usual size, and macho hormones take over, squashing good will towards men and all that other liberal pansy-ass shit.
Black batters Wu against the ropes and rips off his plush Santa hat. He stomps Fuego in the corner before turning his attention back to Wu. Cole enters the ring with a shiny red ornament in hand and clobbers the back of Eli's head with it and then drives it into TK's midsection, front and back. Cole makes a quick exit as a recharged Fuego enters the brawl, attacking Wu and Black with the same body crush.
Wu retaliates with force, slamming the ornament into Fuego's abs, knocking the wind out of him. He offers more ab punishment before Eli taps back into the fight, and tapping very very hard.
The guys throw in every scrap of Christmas wrap and candy cane in the house. Nobody's safe. Nobody even wants to be safe. This is UCW, goddammit, where there's no curfew on rowdiness - and no stopping the havoc until everybody but one has been roundly defeated.
The match is balanced between newbies (Fuego and Wu) and veterans (Black and Cole), but alliances are few and far between, lasting only seconds at best. It's every Santa's helper for himself.
If ever there was a holiday match that could stand on its own merits as a great fight, this is it.
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