A Perfect 10

Scrappy vs Spencer Hawkins, Catalog 16 - The Rougher the Better (MuscleBoy Wrestling)

Few wrestlers in the whole history of underground wrestling match Scrappy in magnetism. If he isn't perfect, I don't know who is - the hair, the skin, the eyes, the mouth, the jawline, the muscles, the charisma, all as finely hewn as a Michelangelo. It will be a long time before the sport finds his equal in star power. He transcends the categories of babyface and heel.

I can't decide whether to pity or envy Spencer Hawkins. I think envy wins. If somebody has to knock my lights out, Scrappy would rank high on my wish list. Spencer always brings up the finer qualities in his opponents, yet there's not much that he can do to polish Scrappy's image any brighter than it already is. All there is to do is avoid, as much as possible, blocking the camera's view of Scrap and take his inevitable licking like a man.

As the catalog description says, this match is mostly give and take between two excellent performers, both of whom defy easy categorization. Scrappy takes an early obvious lead, interrupting his posing session to sucker-punch Spencer and clamp a chinlock on him. "It's a lovely day," he says, responding to Spencer's earlier greeting, "but you're going to be spending it in here with me for a little while. Does that sound good?" The line reminds me of  Cousin Kevin in Tommy, the episode of inter-familial S&M that turned me on when I saw it in '75.

Hawkins fights back, but his punches have no effect against McNair. After seventeen minutes of getting pummeled, choked, and wracked, Hawkins at last turns the tables on the curly-haired Adonis. It's a tasty palette cleanser of well-deserved comeuppance. For six glorious minutes, Spencer's in charge, and Scrappy is, as ever, the perfect seller of the array of punishments rendered. I wasted a lot of tissues and some perfectly good boxer shorts on this match.

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